From the moment of getting your BFP (Big Fat Positive) everything revolved around you. Planning the next 10 months, revolved around you. What you had for dinner, revolved around you. What you did, said, wore, and everything imaginable, revolved around you. You were pregnant! It was as though you held the key to the city, you were the Princess, you were the center of the universe. To some, it may have been absolute bliss, for others, you my have been a tad embarrassed, but soon settled into your role as the pregnant lady.
While in the midst of being the pregnant lady you never thought that special attention would end. You would soon evolve into the wonderful new mother role. Unfortunately, for most mothers, the attention stops as soon as the baby is delivered. Sure, in the hospital nurses are taking care of you, and people come to visit. But let's be realistic here, they aren't there to visit you...they are there for the baby. And at that moment, you love it!
It isn't until you have settled into your new role as a mother that you soon start to feel that the attention is shifted. Not everything is about you. It is all about baby. At first it's wonderful. You get to sit back and see everyone fawn all over your new little bundle. You get to hear about how cute he or she is, who he or she looks like, and they are spoiled with gifts upon gifts. But then it starts to slowly sink in.
No longer are people treating you like the Princess and no longer does the world revolve around you. And to be completely honest, it can hurt. You can be left feeling like you no longer matter. That you were just a vessel for your little baby, and now that he or she has arrived, you are useless. People don't call you to hear about your day, but instead how the baby is doing. You don't get visits to see how you're doing, but to hold baby.
It is completely understandable, and most would think well if they are loving my child, that's all that matters. But trust me, you still need attention too. I am not saying that you have to be on everyone's speed dials, and you don't have to be on top of your pedestal anymore. But it is nice for someone to call to see how you, as a new mother, are doing....and not ask about baby. It's as if in a split second, you go from being a celebrity, to being a nobody...and you've been replaced.
I would like to say it gets better. I am 5 months out, and I haven't seen the light at the end of the baby tunnel yet, but maybe someday. I love my child, and love that he gets so much attention, but I feel, along with many others I'm sure, that we are nobody. I know deep down this is not true, but sometimes...most of the time....it's how it feels. So don't be surprised when it happens, because it will. Just remember that no one does it intentionally, and sometimes you have to make yourself the center of attention...even if it is for an afternoon lunch with a friend sans baby!